A Man that Hath Friends

Friends. I have had many good friends over the years...I could start listing but it was take up alot of my blog space. One thing that I miss sometimes is the friends of the "old" days. You know , the ones that when you see them you pick right up where you left off. The sad reality is that those friends, although many, are scattered across the country. Communication in not in person anymore but restricted to e-mail or long distance calling. Better than no communication at all. I recently heard someone saying they didn't have many friends. My thoughts went to the verse " A man that has friends must show himself friendly". I kindly wanted to say " be a friend first". Sadly, alot of folks want "friends" to be there in their time of need but when it comes right down to it most of us are inherently selfish about "where" we put our energies when it comes to friendships. I overheard some women talking about going to lunch or supper. No problem with that! But the problem came when third parties name came up and because of financial difficulties they excluded that person who really needed the fellowship. I thought to myself...did either one consider treating the third party to lunch? or....if the funds weren't there, how about altering the plans to a day in the park or a simple trip for ice cream so everyone could be included. Don't misunderstand, I know we can't befriend the whole world. I do think that we often miss out of great new friendships by excluding some who aren't in our income bracket ( and you know it happens), or those who don't share our hobbies or talents . Nothing wrong with hanging out with those who share your hobbies or interests....love to do it myself when I can. I do know that there are many in our churches and work places that aren't bold enough to step out to make friends. I can talk to a telephone pole and make conversation, so I pretty much can plow into a new field of people and start sorting out who is even interested in someone intruding on their "safe zone of friends". I'm really interested in doing that...but I am interested in avoiding the "clique" that exclude. I know that some of the folks we sit with ever Sunday and that we assume wouldn't want our friendship are dying for it. I know. I've heard them say it. I pray we take off the blinders and look for opportunities to think out of our comfort zone, me included. Some of my best contact with lost folks or struggling believers have been at the park we lived near in Virginia. I remember one girl that I still talk with. I saw her and wanted to comment on how cute her children were....but I thought " She'll think I'm strange..so I didn't at first. The Lord worked me over and finally I yielded to go over and say that one little phrase which proved to spark a friendship. Not that lifelong friendship, but one of mentoring and caring and listening to struggles that in reality some I didn't care to discuss, some I related too. That one conversation led to " Do you have a church home" to many months of seeing her family attend our church and begine to grow. WE found common ground in that we both have PCOS ( Polysystic Ovarian Syndrome) and we talked about our miracle babies. We were very unlikey to be friends in that our lives were very different in many area, but the more we talked, the more we found we had in common. I don't think Jesus was a bit exclusive about who He talked to. Look at the woman at the well? She didn't exactly have a lilly white resume to present in the area of "men"..and yet he offered her living water. I'm so glad for friends I know that are willing to invite ANYONE to our services at our church...hallelujah! The foot of the cross is level ....all are welcome. I wish it wasn't in our churches, our communites, etc....cliques that is..but we deal with it. When we first moved here I worried that it would take a while to make good friends. I tried so hard to make "instantly" those kind of relationships that take a long time to build up. I tried to "make it happen" with certain folks who were "nice" to me, but it was clean they had there four and no more and that was enough. Did it hurt my feelings? Maybe a little, but I have to chuckle. The more I watch and listen the more I learn. That probably wasn't the group I needed to be in anyway from things I've observed. Sometimes I wonder if I 'm the kind of friend I need to be? Am I aware that others "need" a friend. Do I think that maybe it could be me? Jesus was a friend to sinners. He didn't just hang out with the rich, or the talented..he was available to ALL. I know there are some people that you probably don't need to "move into your house", but is it just possible that we are too extend a little kindness and be like Jesus and reach out..intentionally? You don't have to look far to find those folks that need a Jesus, or just need a christian friend to keep them accountable. You don't have to look far..you sit with some of them ever Sunday!!Friends are an important piece in our lives. But friendship, as wonderful as it can be, isn't always easy. It takes time, effort, and the courage to take a risk and develop friendships. As you apply God's wisdom to your life, your friendships will begin to show the healthy, two-way commitment that marks balances relationships.